Monotonix - King's - 02/03/11

For my 13th birthday, my parents took me to Kanki Japanese House of Steaks for the first time. Mom had gone to the then newly opened restaurant a few months before and billboards were all over town, claiming “The Best Tasting Show in Town!” My pre-pubescent brain was insatiably curious about what this could mean… Was it like- dinner theater? Kabuki? What the hell? I had to know. I pestered my folks until they finally took me as a birthday treat (an annual tradition, still 20 years later!) Once the meal started I realized pretty quickly that A) this was probably my favorite food ever (I am a teppanyaki addict) and B) Ohhhh…. PARADOX! Gotcha… the food itself is the “show”, or the preparation of it, that is.

So Monotonix; the Kanki of the music world… I’m not going to lie and try to act like I knew all about these guys. I’m not a huge fan of this type of music… I am not a major Stooges/MC5 fan, I only know enough to recognize. (ps – This is what these guys sound like... ish.) I’m not the kind of person to “chill out with punk music”. I don’t really get people that can do that… (Drive to target on a Sunday afternoon blasting Black Flag or something? I dunno… I don’t get it… PS- AND it’s almost always dudes. PS- all dudes love Pink Floyd and Tool.) Monotonix is a Dude Band; fueled by mayhem and testosterone… but I wanted to be part of the boy’s club for the night. After hearing years of horror/war stories about their live performances, the King’s show was announced and I definitely jumped on board. I convinced Roo to partake in the anticipated madness via the convincing plethora of youtube videos available of the band.

There were two opening acts: Federation X and Pujol. I watched part of FedX and none of Pujol (sorry Pujol, Neptune’s was a’ callin!) All I am going to say about Federation X is what I told Michele & Jamie I was going to say about them:
.....MAN THAT GUY WON’T STOP SPITTING.
.....WHY IS HE SPITTING EVERYWHERE GROSSSSS
.....IF HE SPITS AGAIN I AM LEAVING

He spit again. I left.

Roo & I had an "adult conversation" at Neptune's and managed to take the best picture ever.

I resurfaced upstairs in a bit to a madhouse. Apparently the band (Monotonix) had set up shop in the middle of the venue and Ami Shalev (LV) and Yonatan Gat (guitarist) were stomping around furiously on top of the bar; kicking beers out of people’s hands and crumpling them with his hands and flinging them across the crowd. I literally had no idea what was going on, but it was intoxicating! I pushed my way forward and got up in the thick of it. There was no definition between the band and the crowd; you could be wherever you wanted to be with these guys. Some random dude behind me had his own drumsticks and was crashing the cymbals along with the drummer. I was practically propping myself up on the drummer (Haggai Fershtman) to keep from losing total footing in the crowd.

Not even sure how it happened, but suddenly Ami is standing in front of me, and his long-ass freaky sweaty hair is smacking me in the face over and over. I had two thoughts… “Man, I can’t wait to see Valient Thorr again” and “Fuckin’ Nasty-ass Sweaty Hair Face Smackin’ Rock n Roll, man... Rock ‘n’ Roooolllll!” (PS – these guys smell really bad. I put everything I was wearing that night directly into the washing machine as soon as I got home… I was doused in beer and covered in dirty hair/pit-sweat... Motherflippin Rock ‘n’ roll, man.)

I had absolutely no idea where Roo was during any of this. I began to scan the crowd for him when suddenly someone or a whole giant group of kids had the brilliant idea to hold Ami up on the drum stool above the crowd and then hold the drum itself up to him to play.

good job, these kids!

I then spied Jen Varani across the room making a video... Bless her! I can almost always remember the camera & I take a million awful pictures; Varani remembers the video…. I got her facebook approval to share this video with you. I absolutely love when I can spy myself in the crown in someone else’s video of a show.

Fist pumping and jazz hands? How drunk WAS I?

Later adventures with the band included a scaling of the wall and performance from the level of Statler and Waldorf (almost!) and then a setup in front of but not on the stage.

AAAAAMMMMOOOOSSSSS!

(ps, amos is my neighbor.)

(ps, everyone in this picture is covered in beer.)

Sometime around this point is when Roo found me and told me he had to leave… Then came an announcement we all apparently knew was coming; that this was the last tour for the band. I then realized the majority of my friends were actually on the stage behind the band, so I joined them, of course!

Michele asked me to take a picture of the drummer’s beautiful back and then miraculously, the best picture ever happened:

whoa.

It was a short show, full of songs I have never heard and can’t see myself jamming along to on my ipod or anything, but it certainly was one of the best tasting shows in town... A PARADOX! For what it was, it was a lot of fun, but I can’t imagine anyone being a huge fan of these guys’ music and I’m sure the majority of their followers are huge followers of the live shows, which are in essence a circus/battlefield/clusterfuck. Am I wrong in thinking this band is more performance art than solely music? Anyone?

I’d recommend seeing these guys live if you ever got the chance, but it would appear that chance may have passed you by! Sorry, kids. Try Valient thorr instead… Just as hairy; possibly even sweatier and certainly harder rockin’. 



Anybody want to go to Kanki?